Writing Samples

What’s a fellow... er, person... to do? The English language is awkward when it comes to sex.

Fifty years ago life was much simpler. If one wanted to write a sentence that referred to both men and women, a masculine pronoun would suffice. For example, “Everyone has his bad days” was perfectly acceptable. 

But in today’s gender-sensitive culture, many consider it inappropriate, even offensive, to use a masculine pronoun when referring to both men and women.

So, how does one use gender-specific pronouns without being boorish?

Rephrasing our sentence to read, “Everyone has his or her bad days,” will keep the cultural watchdogs at bay. But unfortunately, the style’s clumsy. And the alternative, “Everyone has his/er bad days,” is even worse; it’s both gimmicky and clumsy.   

An increasingly popular solution is to substitute a plural pronoun for the gender-specific singular pronoun: “Everyone has their bad days.” But linking a plural pronoun (their) with a singular noun or pronoun (everyone) reflects poorly on our ninth-grade English teacher.  

One way to be culturally up-to-date without being grammatically out-to-lunch is to recast the entire sentence in the plural. Instead of writing, “Everyone has his bad days,” we could say, “All have their bad days.”  

If we must stick with the singular, we can resort to the more drastic step of eliminating sex altogether. “Everyone has his bad days” becomes simply, “Everyone has bad days.” 

In the current evolutionary stage of the English language, using gender-specific pronouns can require creativity and effort. But I hope this brief article at least gives the reader some ideas he or she can use so s/he will have fewer problems with their writing!  

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STUCK IN THE STARTING BLOCKS

Chapter 1 of Ready, Set, Plan, Go!

by Joan Walsh

Imagine you’re watching an Olympic hundred-meter dash. Can you visualize the scene? The runners are pacing nervously around the starting area, stretching. 

“Ready,” calls the starting official.

The runners carefully place their feet in the starting blocks and crouch into their starting positions.

“Set.”

Like coiled springs they wait, eyes focused on the finish line. The starting pistol is poised high in the air. 

BANG!

They’re off! A blur of finely tuned bodies catapults down the track.

But wait! One runner is still stuck in the blocks. He hasn’t moved! There’s something – could it be glue, or flypaper, or something – holding him back.

What if that really happened? How would you react? I suspect I’d be inclined to laugh. What a funny scene – a runner stuck in the blocks! 

But then I’d empathize with that poor runner. I wouldn’t want that to happen to me or to anyone I know. 

Actually, something similar to that happens to many of us at different times in our lives. We get stuck and can’t seem to get traction. But I’m thankful that I’m often able to help people in this situation, because I’m a business coach.

As a coach, I delight in helping people leap over the hurdles that threaten to keep them from winning in life. It thrills me to see my clients unleash their potential and catapult toward their goals!

Are you stuck in the starting blocks, either personally or professionally? Are you putting out lots of effort for very little accomplishment and satisfaction? Maybe you can identify with some of these people I know.

Roger has been the president of his financial services firm for more than forty years. As he sat across the desk from me, tears came to his eyes. “I’m sixty years old, and this business is not where it should be. It’s not growing, and I don’t know how to make it grow. Out of my seven employees, one day last week five were out sick. I feel frustrated and overwhelmed. Maybe I should just retire, but that’s not what I really want.”

I’ll tell you the rest of Roger’s story later in the book. He became a client, and the ending is happier than the beginning. But first, allow me to introduce you to some more people I know.

George was successfully engaged in research for a company that develops and markets food products. Suddenly one of his two partners died, and he had to move into marketing and management. But George didn’t know how to run a business. He didn’t know how to develop a plan and move foreward. He felt paralyzed.

***

Teresa develops new business for a construction company of about fifty employees. She wanted to be more successful, but she was hindered by her boss’s refusal to develop a business plan. “I don’t know where the company’s going,” she admitted, “and I don’t know where I’m going.”

***

Ralph is a manager for a company with $1 billion in annual sales, and he’s underperforming. The truth is, he doesn’t like his job, but he earns over $200,000 per year. He’s unhappy, but he’s afraid to leave. 

I’ll reintroduce you to all of these folks later, in Chapter 3, and give you the rest of their stories. You’ll find them encouraging.

But meanwhile, let’s talk about you. Do you relate to any of their predicaments? Are you stuck in situations that cause you tremendous frustration? Do you feel as if you’re running like crazy and getting nowhere? Are some things demanding lots of your attention, while other more important goals and desires suffer from neglect?

When people ask me to be their coach, they are typically acting out of either desperation or inspiration. The desperate ones often are in anguish and pain. They’re stuck in situations they can’t tolerate much longer. They know they need to change, and they want to change. But they need help. 

Others come to me out of inspiration. They are inspired to take their lives to the next higher level. They’re doing well, but they know they can do better. They’re not satisfied with “good enough.” They want to be the best they can be.

If you’re in either of those categories, I wrote this book for you. It combines sound principles with exercises and real-life examples to make it as practical as possible. I hope you’ll not just read it once, but that you’ll use it as a reference to make sure you stay on track throughout your life.

But there’s one other category of people I encounter. This group doesn’t see the need for change because they’ve become numb to the pain. Perhaps because they don’t think change is possible, they’ve pushed their hearts’ desires down below the conscious level. On the outside they may appear to be doing OK, but inside they have little or no passion and joy.

How do I know about this group of “nummies”? First, statistics consistently show that 60 percent to 70 percent of American workers are unhappy in their jobs. Imagine that! Two out of every three workers almost certainly are performing below their potential and settling for less accomplishment and satisfaction than they should. 

Second, from published research and from my experiences as a coach, I know that most people struggle with attaining balance in their lives. Pressures from work cause them to short-change their personal lives, and vice versa. Demands from multiple directions leave them feeling tense, guilty, cheated, and frustrated.

I encourage you to use the exercises in the next chapter to help you look beneath the surface. You may be surprised at what you uncover. Perhaps you’ll find that you desire change, but that you’ve been suppressing your desires because you didn’t think change was possible. If you’re a “nummie,” I wrote this book for you, too.

All changes are inconvenient; many are even scary and sometimes risky. As you proceed through this book and spot areas that need change, you will confront some barriers that are within you. You will come face to face with your own values, attitudes, disappointments, and fears.

You may find that you need to change your circumstances in order to achieve your goals. Such change usually requires courage, wisdom, and perseverance. You also may learn that you have to change yourself. That always requires courage, wisdom, and perseverance – and usually some humility, as well.

Why humility? Because in order to change, you need to admit to yourself, and usually to some others as well, that you’re stuck. And more than likely you’ll need to ask for help. It’s difficult to see ourselves clearly and objectively. In order to move beyond the blocks that hinder our success, we usually need the insights and encouragement of others.

Remember Ralph, the unhappy manager who earns more than $200,000 a year? In order to bring fulfillment into his life, he may have to be willing to give up the perceived security of that lucrative job. He may have to take risks and change his values. That’s a difficult assignment, especially alone.

I strongly believe you will be most successful and most fulfilled when you are living your passion. You will attain the most significant accomplishments when your passion and your goals are aligned.

I hope this book inspires you to find your passion and go for it. I hope it helps you discover what you were created to do and do it.    

The sign on the door of opportunity reads PUSH.

Author Unknown

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ARE YOU A COACH?

One Man’s Journey To Find His Purpose

David Herdlinger, Business Coach

Most career paths are not straight lines. Mine has been so full of twists and turns that a casual observer might conclude I stumbled into coaching by accident.

But with the benefit of hindsight and years of experience coaching individuals, I see a process at work – a process directed toward authenticity, not unlike peeling the layers off of an onion. Today, as a business coach, I have the privilege of helping others use that same process to find their passion in life and pursue it. Here’s how this process worked in my life.

A Case of Mistaken Identity

I’ve always been goal-directed. In elementary school my goal was to someday be a lawyer. I imagined myself waxing poetic in front of a jury. Twenty years later I was doing just that, as the managing partner of one of the largest and most successful law firms in my state.

Law led to politics. I worked with the top political leaders in the state on their campaigns for governor, U. S. Senator, and other offices. My business life was exhilarating and financially rewarding, but my personal and spiritual life was in disarray. In retrospect I can see that my goals were based on false images of who I was and what I was created to do. 

Showing Up

As a coach, I encourage people to “simply show up and be themselves” – to “be” before they “become.” Without realizing it, by God’s grace, that’s what I started to do. When a large healthcare company offered me an executive position that included oversight of training and development, I accepted.

In my new position, another layer of the onion peeled off. As I worked with some of the premier international consulting firms on a variety of organizational issues, I discovered how much I enjoyed developing people. So much so, in fact, I left the healthcare company after five years and started my own training and development firm.

A Good Question

Initially Herdlinger Associates offered training and development services to small and medium size businesses. We achieved dramatic results using the dynamic “full life” processes developed by Resource Associates Corporation, which focus on the concurrent development of both individuals and organizations.   

Some of my clients who wanted more privacy and in-depth help asked me to work with them on a personal basis. One said, “David, a friend of mine has a business coach. Is that what you do? Are you a coach?” I had never before heard the term “coach” used in a business context. The importance of the question deserved at least a week of thought. But within five seconds I answered, “Yes.” Then I got on the Internet to find out what I had just committed myself to being. 

One Man’s Twists and Turns Help Others

I set out to expand my coaching capabilities by taking additional training in areas where I lacked expertise. Soon the results from my individual coaching efforts far exceeded what I had been able to accomplish in group settings. The transition from lawyer to politician to business executive to organizational development consultant to coach was complete. I had found my purpose in life: to help others develop to their greatest potential.

Today I’m coaching over forty-five clients all around the world, both individually and as members of corporate teams. That’s in addition to mentoring other coaches.

The twists and turns of my life have turned out to be a blessing. Because I had to learn through experience to “show up and be myself,” I’m better able to help others do the same. And what a privilege and joy that is!

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